Death

I walk among the living

I keep life going but others say I steal it from them

whatever I touch dies

I know when it’s someone’s time

and when it is

I walk up behind them,

they’re always unaware that I’m near by,

I put my hand on them, and like they’re falling asleep,

they die

the beating of their heart slows down to a stop

and the heat of their body leaves

I don’t want to do it, but I have to, so life can keep going

only once have I felt the beating heart of an animal that’s alive and well,

only once have I felt the heat of an animal that’s alive and well,

it was when I met a deer that wasn’t afraid when it saw me,

I hesitated to kill it,

It was the first time someone noticed me

it walked off,

I followed it,

Curious why it noticed me,

all the other deer in the herd never stood within ten feet of me and acted like I was never there,

but that one deer was different,

I fell in love with the deer, I stayed by her side for a year

when it would rain or snow I’d use my body as an umbrella to shield her from the elements

and each day I got closer and closer to her, until I was able to stand by her

and she never showed any fear of me,

I never touched her not wanting to kill her,

I didn’t want to kill the thing that I loved,

but one day, she walked up to me,

Closer than she’d ever been,

I wanted to yell,

To scare her so she would get away from me

but, I can’t speak,

so I backed away not wanting to hurt her,

I put my hands in front of me,

Hoping that she would understand to not come any closer,

but she took a step forward,

stretched out her neck,

and nuzzled my hand with her nose.

My eye’s widened with shock.

She couldn’t speak, but I could tell that she knew it was past her time. That I was suppose to kill her when we first met, she knew what I had to do.

She stopped nuzzling my hand,

lifted her head up,

I wanted to cry, but I can’t

And I did what she wanted me to do.

I hugged her.

She wrapped her head around my neck.

hugging me back.

I felt the warmth of her body.

The beating of her heart.

I wanted to stay in that moment forever.

After a minute of us hugging.

I felt the heat leaving her body.

the beating of her heart slow down.

the flutter of her eyelashes as they started closing.

and her legs beginning to crumble beneath the weight of her body.

I slowly descended to the ground with her, putting her slowly on the ground, delicately put her head on the forest floor in front of me.

I stayed by her side all day on my knees like I was praying to god.

And when the light of day was replaced by the inky blackness of night and the glowing sparkle of stars.

I slowly stood up.

keeping my eyes on her not wanting to look at anything else other than her.

and walked away.